I can never say "Why?".
It just won't happen. I just can't.
Often times, as I am reading adoption stories, I think back to the time God led our family through the process.
I remember the mounds of paperwork, meetings, and fingerprinting we had to do, not to mention standing in line getting our passports.
I remember waiting in anticipation by praying, buying things with her name on it, waiting to travel to a foreign country to get her and to see the sites.
I remember missing her when Christmas came around.
(these are the things I can relate to.)
But, I also remember getting the call.
It was not just any ordinary call, but a heartbreaker.
I don't remember much of my emotions that day. I forgot if I was crying or stunned.
But, I kept saying that "God is preparing us for something bigger." I didn't know what the "bigger" was at the moment. I just knew he had something better in store for us.
Sitting in a government glass on a cold March morning, I was reminded. (okay, maybe it sparked my remembrance.) In the months to come, I realized that...
I wouldn't have changed a thing.
Not one. single. thing.
I just can't.